I think I forgot how to be that person who’s extremely hopeful, positive (although mostly depressed). I can be quite positive when I think of my future in general. But that doesn’t mean that negative thoughts aren’t looming at the back of my head now and again.

Is this the “new” cynical me? Or is it just reality setting in? Scooping out my optimism for life with glee.

Whenever I feel good about something, there will be 10 different things that I need to worry about later. I know things aren’t meant to be smooth. But a break now and then would be nice.

I need to soldier on. My spirit may be more clouded by the reality of my situation even more than ever, but it shall not dampen me.

I feel less heavy with all that weight ‘coz I know that the current me is more able to tough it out. Not running. Not hiding.

Yes, I will and I must soldier on.

:)

**Do read the wikipage on this lovely fairy tale I always loved as a child on The Steadfast Tin Soldier.